JOTD
- Thread starter Silver Soul
- Start date
Graham Martin is in Hospital:
Who the hell is GRAHAM?
Well, Graham is the geezer who got home late one night and Helen his wife, says. "Where the hell have you been?"
Graham replies. "I was getting a tattoo!"
"A tattoo?" She frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?"
"I got a hundred dollar note on my privates." He said proudly.
"What the hell were you thinking?" She said, shaking her head in disgust. "Why on earth would a Chartered Accountant get a hundred dollar note tattooed on his privates?"
"Well, one, I like to watch my money grow.
Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.
Three, I like how money feels in my hand.
And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred dollars anytime you want."
Graham is now in The Critical Care Unit, Room 233. No visitors until further notice...............
credit: Tilan Nimesh
Who the hell is GRAHAM?
Well, Graham is the geezer who got home late one night and Helen his wife, says. "Where the hell have you been?"
Graham replies. "I was getting a tattoo!"
"A tattoo?" She frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?"
"I got a hundred dollar note on my privates." He said proudly.
"What the hell were you thinking?" She said, shaking her head in disgust. "Why on earth would a Chartered Accountant get a hundred dollar note tattooed on his privates?"
"Well, one, I like to watch my money grow.
Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.
Three, I like how money feels in my hand.
And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred dollars anytime you want."
Graham is now in The Critical Care Unit, Room 233. No visitors until further notice...............
credit: Tilan Nimesh
Vladimir Putin, wanting to get on the good side of voters, goes to visit a school in Moscow to have a chat with the kids.
He talks to them about how Russia is a powerful nation and how he wants the best for the people.
At the end of the talk, there is some time for questions.
Little Sasha puts her hand up and says :
?I have two questions. My questions are ...
Why did the Russians take Crimea?
And why are we sending troops to Ukraine?"
Putin says :
"Hmmm? Yes. Thank you. This is two good questions ..."
But just as he is about to answer, the bell goes, and all the kids go for lunch.
When they come back, they sit back down and there is room for some more questions so another girl, Misha, puts her hand up and says :
?I have four questions. My Questions are ....
Why did the Russians invade Crimea?
Why are we sending troops to Ukraine?
Why did the bell go 20 minutes early for lunch?
And where the fuck is Sasha?!?
He talks to them about how Russia is a powerful nation and how he wants the best for the people.
At the end of the talk, there is some time for questions.
Little Sasha puts her hand up and says :
?I have two questions. My questions are ...
Why did the Russians take Crimea?
And why are we sending troops to Ukraine?"
Putin says :
"Hmmm? Yes. Thank you. This is two good questions ..."
But just as he is about to answer, the bell goes, and all the kids go for lunch.
When they come back, they sit back down and there is room for some more questions so another girl, Misha, puts her hand up and says :
?I have four questions. My Questions are ....
Why did the Russians invade Crimea?
Why are we sending troops to Ukraine?
Why did the bell go 20 minutes early for lunch?
And where the fuck is Sasha?!?
